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Ever since I was a child, Sundays have been days of anxiety and ennui. The anxiety came from going to Mass, catching the 10:00 that had to be done by 10:45 so they could get ready for the 11. Mass brought on anxiety because of mix of the metaphysical and pedantic. Churches have always been spiritual calming places for me, and depending upon the priest who performed the Mass, the homily could evoke either a one note lecture or a sense of imminent damnation. The ennui came from the fact that Sundays were the end of the weekend, the day to prepare for school, which meant an end to losing myself in what entered me and taking up the yoke of school. Now I took up that yoke hesitantly and often in a slipshod manner that showed in my grades. I often arrived on Monday morning ill prepared and with little of my so-called homework done. Unfortunately, there was always an old movie to watch or a book I wanted to finish rather than homework.

Sundays still have a residual of those old feelings. They have become muscle memory, a rote response to a day in the week. It has been too long since I last sat in a pew for a Mass, not so much a lapsed Catholic but one living somewhere where you don’t find many Catholic churches and finding excuses in my seclusion, I no longer have homework so I use movies and books to avoid other things I should be doing like finishing my novel.Sundays… maybe I should embrace the spiritual and indolent nature of the day and enjoy them more.


TV Watching

Watching new episode of Hell on Wheels. I’m a big fan of Westerns and actually wrote a e-book called Murder in Cheyenne. The book took place during the winter when the Pacific Union was stuck because of a bad winter in Cheyenne. The story involves a serial murder, a vigilante group, and a Pinkerton and his close friend, who has been fired by the railroad to find the serial killer. It was fun to research and write.

Post Election respite

I gauge that we have a week or two before politicians start running for president. What the United States needs the most is a break from elections. A law should be passed that politicians can’t campaign until there is a year before election then they get six months to elect candidates and six months for those candidates to run for president. Take a year out of our life not this constant onslaught of men and women running for president. Give us a break.

Election time.

This is quickly becoming my least favorite time of the year. Daily we face television ads filled with either lies or smears. Too often you can’t tell who is in what party, as the candidates attempt to run stealth campaigns in order to sneak into office. Promises are made which will never be kept. It appears that politicians are become their stereotype. They have turned sincerity into a campaigning tool and charisma has replaced ethics. The worst part of this charade is that most Americans follow along defending the indefensible because of party affiliation rather than having commonsense and voting for someone who would be good for this country. No wonder the worlds appears to be a more violent and crazier these days.

Russell Brand

I read Russell Brand’s reaction to the act of terrorism in Canada and I’d like to add my opinion of him. He is a pompous ass who believes that celebrity has given him insight. What he does possess is an unfortunate world view that ennobles those who would treat women as chattel, homosexuals as animals, and non-believers as people to either be converted or killed. Now Russell would probably joke in his insightful way – you mean conservatives? No, Russ, I mean Islamic extremists. Russ, take your head out of your anus and live by your beliefs – move to Iraq and entertain ISIS.


Here I am listening to the news and I hear that the CDC allowed a nurse to travel on a plane with a fever and I think – That’s not right. Shouldn’t they be looking to isolate those with the potential to spread Ebola. Later that day I hear an interview with Dr. Friedden of the CDC that the reason we shouldn’t impose travel bans from those countries spreading Ebola is because they are fledgling democracy. On this note I think – I though the CDC stood for the Center for Disease Control. Are they treating Ebola like it is a substitute for democracy which we want to see spread? I hope not.

I have no problem giving aid and comfort to those countries but access to the US seems a little unnecessary until the Ebola outbreak in their country is under control. More important is our country being run by a pack of adolescent dolts who believe in agenda and policy over common sense. Every America who contracts Ebola in this country from this point should be allowed to sue the federal government for endangerment. On top of that isn’t it time that we start voting for competent candidates who state their policies clearly and their intentions loudly instead Donkeys and Elephants who hide their intentions and are beginning to ruin this country. Just a thought.


The white page awaits to be filled and all I can do is stare. Bad sales on my book has given me temporary writer’s block, or as I like to call it – the crippling feeling that I somehow lost all my talent in my sleep. I am trying to force my way through it, but it isn’t working, so I’ve decided to read my way out of it. In the hopes of finding my voice again, I’m reading Raymond Chandler, Brideshead Revisited, Dresden Files, Jane Austen and whatever else I can get my hands on. (Yeah, yeah for all those half witted grammar Nazis I ended a sentence in a preposition. So what? Faulkner made a living on run on sentences.) The white age awaits. It needs to be filled. Hell, it should be filled. But it has to be filled by something interest, something worth reading, and something pretty well written. Unfortunately, I’m not there yet.

ALS Challenge

I read where Pamela Anderson refused to ice bucket challenge because ALS experiments on animals for cures. Since she is so strong in her belief about animal experimentation, I have a alternative for her. Let them experiment on her. Hell, she’s already allowed plastic surgeons to experiment.

Also, Zachary Quinto refused the challenge because of the drought in California. My solution for him is that he moves to San Francisco, where the city has been allowed to ignore the drought and water restrictions even though farmers, who produce much needed food supplies, have been forced to adhere to water restrictions.

Just some solutions for those who need them.

Sometimes you can hope.

I don’t know if I’m the only one who feels that both political parties have failed us. Elephant or Donkey they care little about unintended consequences and push agendas down our throat. I want a third political party, one that believes in compromise, the constitution, and all Americans. I want a political party that believes in the middle class, rather have things built in America than in other countries, and respected individual rights. You can dream, right?


The news of Robin Williams suicide was jarring. He was almost stereotypical in that he was a comedian forever mired in depression. Groucho Marx, one of the most brilliant comedians there ever was, was known for his dour and depressed off screen personality. There was a story about him touring Wall Street. They brought him to the the balcony to view the floor of the stock exchange. Now in the 1920s he took a bath when the stock fell and he never forgot that fact. Here he was staring at the stock floor the men working their asses off buying and selling stocks. Some of them noticed Groucho and pointed at him. He took advantage of this and starting to make quips and make them laugh. Suddenly, everyone was watching him and laughing. After ten minutes he stopped and people went back to work. Groucho for his part turns to his tour guide and says: I feel better because I know I just cost some smuck a fortune. Now I’m even with Wall Street.

There are other famous comedians with similar stories and similar problems of depression. Bert Williams was a black vaudeville comedian who many thought was the funniest man alive. WC Fields said that he was the funniest man alive and the saddest man who ever lived. I guess what I’m saying is I hope there is laughter in the afterlife and Robin Williams adds to it.

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